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Affection, Purpose, Responsibility, and Meaning


My partner once said, “My purpose in life is not just to swim in the ocean the whole day or just to eat fruits and go to sauna. I know I have a bigger purpose in this life; to be of service to others and to make things easier and better for them.” Hearing this, I was glad and inspired to know that the person that I’m with right now is a conscious being that is determined to take responsibility for her own life; to stand up, work, and of course grow for this purpose. Having a purpose means having goals and being resolute to take the responsibility and face the tasks and challenges in life for your self and sometimes even for other people you love and care for. For our lives to have meaning, we must have purpose and we must take the responsibility for ourselves or for this purpose. We create our own meaning of life, so to speak.  


One of my biggest questions in life is that: aren’t we born on this planet to take care of each other and to help each other evolve and experience the real beauty of existence? Aren’t we supposed to protect each other and make sure everyone around us is safe? Of course, for some this is a ridiculous notion. However, for us to live with harmony and peace, it is important to listen and to respect each other while also making each other feel secured. Many people deny this and think that everyone should be on her/his own all the time; without someone giving care, support, or affection. They do not agree that loving someone is caring for them and yes, somehow being responsible. A responsibility in a sense that you are concerned to someone’s life, especially to the person you love the most, and not that you have to control everything around that person or you have to remind her/him all the time about your concerns and worries. It is about taking care of the person without forcing him or her to do what you want just for your own interest and satisfaction. It also simply means that the person can count on you whenever she or he needs your support.

These days, people have been so fragmented than ever before. Many people, despite that we are too many on this planet, experience loneliness and the lack of affection. Many individuals suffer depression and anxiety and it is sad that not so much people care enough about this. This is partly because many ideas or concepts of existence (ideologies, philosophies, cultural influences, etc.) today are set to divide us and prevent us from having genuine connections with one another; a great polarization through politics (and through gender). As one of the consequences, many people don’t want (or are afraid) to take responsibility anymore.  But no matter what, always remember that if you are determined to be with someone, to help and support her/him on her journey and visions in this life (even if you are aware of the impermanence of the situation), you must do your best for this self-chosen purpose and duty. If you choose to, you must dedicate some of your precious time to them and you must give some parts of your self to help them get their needs met. However, this doesn’t mean that you wouldn’t expect something in return; you are doing this for your growth as well. You have to get rewards from the good things that you’ve done because you also deserved them. Fair enough. However, if the person chooses not to give back, you cannot force them. All you can do is to try to work on your chosen purpose and to love them as if you’re being responsible to your self; your own feelings and needs.  

Featured Photo: iamfearlesssoul.com/what-is-my-why/