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The Deficiency of Affection


Every person in the world needs affection. All of us as humans, consciously or unconsciously, have the need to get connected to other people not only mentally but also emotionally and physically. And as a human being, having the awareness that someone or other people are concerned with us or willing to get intimate with us, we will have a sense of emotional satisfaction and comfort. This physical connection and exchange of affection doesn’t have to be always sexual and we don’t need to look for long-term committed relationships for this either (if we can). However, most of us do especially after we reach adolescence. This is normal as there are so many factors that make us insecure living in a current society that has been very fragmented from one another. As the world progresses every day, important issues such as gender, politics, mental and physical health, and other vital issues concerning humans and society are also becoming more and more complex and our gap from one another is also becoming wider and wider making it so hard for many of us to cope.    


Normally, most individuals find a partner or a group of friends that could be a source of intimacy and affection. This is the main reason why things like social media are also in-demand these days. However, most experts would agree that it is healthier if we connect personally. Through this, we can experience positive social interactions with other individuals, mostly including physical contact (handshakes, kisses, hugs, etc.) as a natural expression of affection. But always remember that, this post-modern environment we are having has become so utterly composite that we have to be careful in connecting and interacting, let alone having a closed relationship with other people as they could also potentially harm or even destroy us. But having so in an appropriate manner and amount, this could provide huge benefits to our physical, emotional, and psychological aspects; allowing us to meet this need (affection) for our well-being.

There have been so many researches and studies about this topic and it is urgent that we all have to listen and pay close attention to what is happening. In this way we can truly understand the deeper reasons for a person’s actions and provide answers to many of these questions regarding our social relationships (the way we interact with one another), and our affection needs. If we don’t get enough of these answers to our needs, it is normal for some of us to seek out alternatives so that we can beat the feelings of isolation and fill the void within. Many people do this by consuming substances that could bring similar biochemical results or specifically, dopamine. Others resort to hogwash entertainments (unfortunately) and even superficial friendships just to get connected socially. Sadly, some end up cheating as they desperately need more affection but are afraid to lose their partner. And for some, they try to cope by watching pornographic films. They succumb to the illusion just to have a sense of satisfaction (even though this is false) from the neurochemicals that is being released after an orgasm. However, one should always keep in mind that these temporary substitutes could also lead to serious problems and addiction and further stress instead of positive benefits.

So much like loneliness, affection deficiency can bring a very devastating impact to the individual. That is why it is crucial to seek out ways to remedy this by being socially connected and interactive. However, if you are a person that prefers solitude and detachment over social interaction, it is perfectly up to you for as long as you don’t suffer a serious consequence. But remember, having a genuine connection to other individuals is very important for your affection needs to be met.

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